Tuesday, September 24, 2013

Talk about it Tuesday: Cheers to us, my Love!

At the beginning of the month I posted a compilation of life lessons I've learned while being married. More specifically- being married to an EOD tech. Now, although those particular lessons seem futile to those outside EOD I figured I should share the lessons that we've learned just by being married in general.

We met in high school and dated for a couple years before we decided to get married. It was the best decision I have ever made. Nine years ago I promised the man of my dreams that I would love him until the day I die. We have learned so much about each other and what it means to love whole heartedly. Our relationship today is stronger than it has ever been. We have so much love for each other that it almost seems unreal.

Right now, Husband is thousands of miles away but even still I feel his love for me as if he were sitting right here on our patio on this beautiful and perfect fall morning.

We were talking a couple weeks ago about what we've learned over these past 9 years and without a doubt, for us communication is the number one thing that has made this marriage a success. I think our greatest strength as a couple has to be the way we openly talk about anything and everything. There is no fear of hurting each other's feelings when it comes to the nitty gritty stuff because we know how to talk through whatever situation we find ourselves in. Looking back at it now, we have hardly ever bickered. The little things don't get to us anymore and over the course of our relationship I can only think of two major arguments. And even then, we talked it through logically and rationally and we're still standing side by side today.

Respect for one another is just as important as open communication. We respect each other's differences of opinion and even when we don't see eye to eye we have never talked down to one another. There was never any name calling or degrading of each other's feelings. We respect each other's personal space and we understood early on that it is important to encourage one another regardless of whether we agree or not. We are each others' biggest fans and greatest cheerleaders. You may not talk shit about my Husband in my presence. Granted, he gives nobody any reason to do so. You know those couples that vent to their friends about the things that get on their nerves about their spouses? Yea, we're not that couple. You will NEVER hear either one of us say a bad thing about the other. One, because we actually like each other and two, we've always looked at it as "Us against the world."

Maintaining a strong sense of self is something that I think makes us a phenomenal couple. It is so easy for a couple to mimic each other, especially after being together for as long as we have. I must admit that I lost sight of who I was as an individual early in our marriage but with his encouragement, I was able to find that girl again and I've stayed true to myself ever since. Husband and I have always encouraged each other to pursue our separate passions and we have never resented each other for doing so.

Understanding the fine line between giving each other space when we're dealing with personal demons and knowing when to just be there for each other is something that we have mastered over the years. We know that sometimes it's not about solving each other's problem right then and there, but rather just having that unspoken support. Sometimes, we just need one of those hugs...

Lawrence and I are an incredible team. We tackle things together like no body's business and I am so grateful to have had the love of this man for so many years. I still think God made a mistake for bringing us together because I don't feel like I deserve this amazing, selfless man.

I'm not one for gushy love stuff but when I think of what makes me truly happy, the only thing I see- is him. From the start of our relationship I have been so smitten with Lawrence it was almost gross, haha. When I get to talk about him to other people, I can feel myself light up from inside. I've been told on multiple occasions that I glow when I talk about him. I can't help it... I am so proud of the man he is today. He has accomplished so much in his life already and I am just so grateful that I got to be apart of it all. All the good that I do and the positivity that I bring to the table is simply because of him.

This man has loved me for so many years, it's mind boggling. I'm not an easy person to love, and I mean that with all seriousness- ask anyone. There are so many different opinions on what "true love" means. And I know it sounds soooo cliche but really, it was just one of those things that I knew from the get go. I felt something special with him- deep in my heart with utter certainty and even at 16, I just KNEW he was the one person who would impact my life in so many positive ways.

All of my dreams have come true because of Lawrence. He has taken me on some wild adventures and has given me the life of a princess. He is my best friend and my absolute favorite person in the whole wide world. Even on our bad days, and we've had a few, there was never a doubt that we were made for each other.

I can't imagine a life without him, and I hope I never have to. No matter what the future holds for us he will always be my rock, my home, my peace. Cheers to us my Love!

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