Monday, October 28, 2013

Doing no harm

[...We are in a time of renewal, tending to matters of the past, that eventually, must be left behind.
We're plunged, once again into states of dis-equillibrium, entering into mysterious waters.
Our personalities are tested for strength and adaptability.]

I'm not religious. I was raised in a rather ironic Catholic household. I mean, sure my parents tried to do their best at showing us how to live a life serving God but even at 4, I realized the conflict. The conflict of my father drinking a beer and smoking a cigarette (thy body is a temple?) before heading to Sunday Mass. The conflict of my mother hiding (do not lie, do not steal) the shopping bags full of new clothes and shoes that we couldn't afford in the trunk of her car. They were clearly misguided, but in our culture questions could not be asked. My parents did things the way their parents did things, which was the way their parents did things. No one stopped to question why. 

There is not much that I remember about my childhood because when I turned 14, I pretty much stopped giving a shit. I dumped all the things that caused my heart rate to skyrocket and told myself to start over. It became so undeniably obvious that my parents had no clue about life and how to cultivate a curious mind. The phrase "because I said so" was so frequently thrown around and I started to rebel. "Because I said so" is not a valid reason to be used, ever, in my opinion.

I started to seek answers for myself which took me on a wild spiritual journey. I sought out anything that could open the gates of my boundless mind and allow it to explore alternate ways of seeing things. The Bible says this, my great grandfather did things this way, my heritage condones such and such... But why??? All I wanted was just greater insight to the way things were being done. It wasn't a matter of changing anything about everything, it was just a curiosity that craved constant attention.

I believe in energy, cosmic tides, the moon and all that astrological jazz. I feel like even though there is no sound proof (science), the attempted explanations offer me what I feel is more accurate information than anything a religion could spit at me. I'm pretty in tune with my emotions and when I wake up in a weird mood, with something or someone so strong on my mind that I haven't thought of in years- I evaluate what my stars are doing, not some interpretation of what Jesus supposedly did centuries ago.

The excerpt above is from a columnist I sporadically follow. I don't hold on to her words like they are law, but I definitely appreciate how she seems to hit the nail on the head in terms of what is happening in my life. Sure, it can be argued that horoscopes are so vaguely written to con "people like me" into believing what we want to believe. But, can't that be said for religion as well? All it is- is someone's interpretation of what someone else believes. If you're cool with it- so am I.

This week, it was as if Risa was speaking exclusively to me about the haps in my life. I am not worried about her predictions and I'm taking her advice with a grain of salt. I just find it so interesting that as she is speaking it, I am living it- 5,000 miles away. No connection, no knowledge of either of our existence in each other's lives. Yet, so on point. I like that.

Mysterious waters??? Bring it.


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